"PMS, Pregnancy, Insomnia, And Carbs: The Rantings Of A [PMS] Chronic Googler"

DISCLAIMER: This blog contains a lot of TMI, so if you don’t like reading about girly stuff and that time of the month, stop now. Also, I am not pregnant. Anytime a woman of childbearing age even MENTIONS pregnancy in some shape or form someone will assume she is pregnant. I am not. END OF DISCLAIMER

It’s after midnight and I find myself unable to sleep. I know my youngest will be up in 6 or 7 hours so by the time I manage to make myself go to bed and fall asleep, I’m not looking at much sleep. Certainly not enough to make me feel semi-human. But that’s what coffee is for, right?!

I was curious as to why I can’t sleep when I’ve never been one to have sleep issues. Unless it’s a full moon (I’m not a werewolf, promise) or I’m enjoying a night out (which is rare and then I’m up by choice) I don’t have problems sleeping. I guess I did have problems sleeping when I was pregnant, but I’m not pregnant.

That got me thinking about pregnancy symptoms which got me thinking about PMS symptoms because, TMI warning, it’s getting close to that time of the month. This all led me to thinking about how weird it is that pregnancy symptoms and PMS symptoms are so darn similar. I understand logically because of hormones and all that, but why the heck would nature do that to you?

If you’re of reproductive age and could possibly be pregnant at all this fact basically would cause you to have a little mini-freak out (good or bad) monthly. Cramps? No worries. You’re probably going to start soon, but then again it could be a fertilized egg implanting into your uterus. Tired? You’re probably getting ready to start, but then again you could be growing a tiny human inside of you. Sore boobs? Period or preggo. Hungry all the time? Period or preggo. The list goes on and on. For every PMS symptom and normalcy I look up, the same could be said for pregnancy symptoms. It’s crazy. Like I said, I understand it’s the hormones but why can’t nature give you a sign like… If you are specifically craving Doritos then it is indeed just PMS, but if it’s a hoagie you desire, it’s definitely a baby. Then again I have those cravings on a daily basis and it’s just because I love carbs.

In all my random thoughts and Googling, it turns out insomnia is indeed a symptom of PMS (and pregnancy, go figure). If you care to read about it, click here: http://www.webmd.com/women/pms/features/why-pms-gives-you-insomnia

Then again I guess nature does give you a big fat sign it was just PMS and that is your uterine lining shedding and escaping your body.

So thanks Mother Nature. I will literally be cursing you tomorrow when I’m falling asleep on the couch to the sound of Mickey Mouse and my children asking to be fed.

Potty Training And The Not So Naked "Naked" Method

Potty training. It’s an infamous phrase that brings both joy and fear to parents everywhere. Joy at the thought of no longer buying diapers and changing stinky messes, but pure unadulterated fear at the process; accidents, extra laundry, and wondering if you’ll ever be able to leave the house without constant fear of your child peeing everywhere in your local Target store.

Before I talk about what worked for me with our oldest child, let me just say… every child is different. What works for one child may not work for another child. And if they are not ready for it, they will not do it. You can’t force potty training or it will just backfire on you. Like, figuratively AND literally. You’ve seen what 2 year olds are capable of, right? If they are angry they will not hesitate to crap their pants in the middle of the grocery store while looking you dead in the eye.

So now that we have established that potty training can be trial and error and is not at all remotely possible unless a child is physically and mentally ready, here is my experience on what worked for us.

Tip #1: Just say “no” to Pull-Ups. I don’t mean to hate on Huggies. I have used them religiously with both of my kids. They are great quality and the tools they have online for potty training are awesome. However, the big kid version of diapers, aka Pull-Ups, are nothing more than slightly thinner diapers. They are not really that easy to pull up or down and they feel exactly the same as diapers. Sure, some kinds turn colors or fade or become cool when your child is wet, but it is still just a fancy diaper. Your child has to learn what it feels like to be wet and they cannot do that when they are wearing cotton and gel beads that absorb it all away.

I will say Pull-Ups can be a fun step before you really dive into potty training. It can help them feel like more of a big kid while still saving your sanity and your car seat.

Tip #2: Say “hello” to big kid undies. What does your kid wear if they don’t wear diapers or Pull-Ups? Well, undies! That’s the goal anyway, so why not just do it? Your child will feel special and get used to wearing them. You can make picking some out a fun event. They will feel grown-up and having brand new undies can make it easier to say goodbye to the diapers.

Undies also allow kids to actually feel when they are wet. Before when they would pee in their diaper, it would soak up nicely and they could go about their activities. With undies, they are going to feel that they are wet right away and they will also be able to see it. This will help them realize that when they feel like they have to pee and they do so in their undies, they will make a big wet mess.

Tip #3: Put the potty (or the child) in an easy and accessible area. Most kids start out potty training with their own special child-sized potty. However, some kids go right for the “real” toilet as well and that’s ok too. You just want to make sure the potty is close-by so your child can get there quickly.

With our daughter, we put her potty in the living room where she spent the most time. It also helped that that room had a wood floor so it made cleanup easier (if you have carpet, make sure to invest in some good spot cleaner or even a steam cleaner).

Tip #4: Don’t feel bad about giving out candy as a reward. When I first started the potty-training journey, I swore I would never use food as a reward. I was scared that giving her food as a reward would teach her it’s ok to reward oneself with unhealthy things just because you completed a task. I didn’t want to add to any more unhealthy eating habits she may learn or have inherited from this carb-loving Mommy. However, praise and stickers just did not do the trick, but M n’ M’s sure did. I got the little mini ones in the tube and one or two after she successfully went on the potty made her quite happy. And it really wasn’t hard to wean her off of expecting them every time she went. As long as you’re pro-active about making sure their eating habits don’t get crazy, then don’t beat yourself up for resorting to candy.

Tip #5: Don’t get angry when accidents happen. Sure, it’s easy to want to scream when there is a pile of poop in the corner or you just stepped in a warm pool of urine, but don’t lose your cool. Your child will feel shamed, rejected, or even angry. And remember what angry toddlers are capable of? None of those feelings will help encourage them to keep trying. Make sure you just tell them to make sure they listen to their body and use the potty next time.

These five tips are all things we did to potty-train our oldest. She was 2.5 at the time. One day we told her that she was ready to wear big girl undies and we were going to say “bye” to her precious Minnie Mouse Pull-ups. She got some fun new big girl undies and we let her wear them around the house. She wore undies and only undies as it helped her really see what happened when she had an accident. Plus, it cut down on laundry. When she had accidents, she could really see what would happen and how annoying it was to be all wet. We would immediately sit her on her potty, and whenever she successfully went on the potty, she got an M n’ M. Within 24 hours she was using the potty every time.

I’ll admit, it’s pretty cool to be able to say she was potty-trained within 24-hours, but like I said… every kid is different. And our second may very well have a completely different process that takes forever. Who knows!

Some other things to keep in mind with potty training:

11.)  Accidents will happen. Even when you’re child pretty much has the hang of it, there will be days they wait too long or get too busy playing and “forget”.

22.)  Staying dry at night usually comes much later. I didn’t realize it takes many children a lot longer to stay dry at night. I was expecting our oldest to just sleep through the night and be fine, but I found her Pull-Up (which we were luckily still using at night) was soaked in the morning still. Many kids aren’t developmentally ready to hold it all night until they are around 4 or 5. Some kids take even longer and sometimes you’ll get lucky and have a little one who actually can stay dry at night at a young age.

33.)  Regression is completely normal. I could have lost my mind when our then almost 3-year old started having accidents again. And then I really about lost my mind when she started doing it on purpose. I’d read about regression being totally normal and I realized she was just trying to have some control in a time when a lot was changing for her; we had another baby on the way! You have to realize it is 100% normal and it doesn’t mean you or your child have failed in anyway.

44.) Books are great tools. You can never go wrong with books about potty-training or big kid undies. It mentally prepares your child and keeps them engaged. 

I hope sharing my experience and what worked for us will help some of you in your potty-training journey. I know I will be doing it all over again when our little guy is ready.

I’m really glad I own a carpet cleaner because our new home is about 80% carpet…

"How To Keep Your House Clean Most Of The Time" -By A Borderline OCD Stay At Home Mom

My friends like to joke that I’m a little OCD about cleaning. I don’t think I am at all, but I’ll take the compliment.

I think it’s funny in a way as when they say this, my house is semi-clean because well, I’ve been expecting company so I did clean. I’m sure if they just popped on over on a Thursday morning when I said I was staying in and doing nothing they would think differently.

And if you think my house is clean… you should see my Mother-in-law’s house. Her house is so clean that I have never even found a speck of dust in it. And I’ve even tried just out of sheer curiosity. I have no idea how it is so damn clean, but it puts anyone else’s house to shame. It may very well be in a bubble where mess just does not exist. I think she might be magic when it comes to cleanliness and organization. Oh, and where to find good deals on clothes and shoes. Pure magic!

But I digress… While my house is certainly not perfect, I do have some tips I have been using since having our second child that I have found to be a big help.

11.)  Find a cleaning calendar/chart or some kind of VISUAL system to help you stay organized and know what you’re going to clean and when. The best one I have found for how my mind works is this one:

http://funcheaporfree.com/2011/12/youre-welcome-wednesday-tip-keep-your-3/

This one works well for me and keeps me on track. And sometimes it just is a decoration on my fridge that tricks people into thinking I really clean that much. Whatever works, right?

22.)  Get rid of the clutter. We all have stuff we don’t need or use. Heck, we probably have things we don’t even want but are holding onto for a myriad of reasons. One of the reasons this house is far more organized than my past homes is because we moved into it a year ago and I had the movers put EVERYTHING in the garage (except for furniture) and I brought it in ONE BOX AT A TIME. It was time consuming and not the most productive way to do things, but for my sanity it was nice to be able to clean things and find a home for them right away. I wouldn’t bring another box into the house until the previous box’s contents had a home.

Now, I realize this isn’t something you can do unless you’re moving, but modify this technique and start by going through every room in your home, one at a time. Go through everything and get rid of what you don’t want or need.  And then clean that same room. Get every room how you want it and you’ll feel much better. Sell some of those things and make some money or donate it to a charity. You’ll feel so much better. Trust me. And trust science: http://www.houselogic.com/blog/home-improvement/clutter-depression/ 

33.)  Have a permanent donation box in your garage or someplace handy where you can immediately place unwanted items instead of stuffing them in a closet or drawer where they just become clutter. Once that box is full, donate it and repeat. A great organization that even picks up in some areas is this one: http://www.purpleheart.org 

44.)  Get a dog. No, I’m not joking. You should see the before and after pictures of when my son just gets done eating. My husband takes him upstairs to get a bath and I let the dog in to have his second dinner. He licks up every last crumb (as long as it’s safe for dogs) and then all I have to do is remember to steam mop the floor (if I get to it). Our dog seriously saves us about 10 minutes of cleanup time after meals and he saves my sanity in general by ensuring I don’t find the crackers or breakfast bar my son ground into the carpet. Not to mention a home with endless surprise treats and two children that will love and play with you is exactly what a dog wants! Well, most dogs that is. Find the right fit for you, ensure everyone is onboard, and say, “let’s do it” to give a deserving dog a forever home. There are many great shelters and agencies to find a dog through, but if you’re in my area I would HIGHLY recommend this one: http://www.twyla.org

Oh, and because dog’s like to shed, you’ll find yourself vacuuming a lot more. It’s annoying at first and I’m probably not helping you get on board with this whole “get a dog” thing if you’re on the fence, but you’ll realize how nice your carpet always looks from the constant vacuuming. Or as my British friend says, “You hoover every day!” Yup. I do. Because if I didn’t my house would smell like dog (more so than it does now) and you could knit a sweater from the dog hair that would stick to you.

So there you have it. I’ll stop at those four tips because let’s be honest, this entry is getting a bit long and you’re probably at the point where you’re starting to wonder when it ends. If you haven’t stopped reading already, that is.

Although, typical of my rambling self, I do have one more tip for you and that is… DON’T BE SO HARD ON YOURSELF. I’m a mother of two children under 5. I have a dog and a tiny beta fish and they are both pretty low maintenance, but I still have to keep them alive. I am married to a wonderful man. I have play dates, preschool, friends of my own, grocery shopping, and much much much more to do. Sometimes my house is clean and sometimes it gets completely out of control. And that’s ok. As long as you’re not living in filth and everyone is happy and healthy, who cares. Your friends won’t care. And if they thought less of you because you left dishes in the sink or decided to let that pile of Cheerios in the corner sit a bit longer before vacuuming (or letting your dog in), then they are not the kind of friends you want.